The release of Episode I – A short story

Here is a short story telling the tale of a fragile minded Star Wars mega-fan who really didn’t take the release of The Phantom Menace too well.

16 years have passed since the last time I felt this alone. When the last released, it was magical, the story had an ending and I felt complete. All characters in my story had now found their place in the universe and their chapters had ceased. Then 16 years. Nothing in those years. I reminisced over the 3-part masterpiece. I took notice of the trilogy in hand making sure I was more knowledgeable about this fictional world than my own life. But now. Now after 16 years of nothing, something new has arisen from the ashes of the previous victories to reveal a sudden piece of mundane shit that is far unworthy to be under the same name as anything in the galaxy. To witness the monstrosity, I was forced to sacrifice £4.20. £4.20 that I will never get back after using it to ruin the best part of 1 years of joy and happiness. Of reminiscing. Of pure beauty. And now I would even go as far to say I was in love. A melancholy feeling which no-one can really describe, yet understand with utmost clarity. My eyes are physically sore after witnessing the series-killer that sent me over the edge and broke my heart many times over. I had watched the previous films more times that I had drawn breaths. While with this new monstrosity I have only the once. I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. I’d never ever never watch that film again if you paid me all the republic credits in the galaxy.

Before ruining my one passion, my very life, I was ecstatic with the feeling that I would watch something that I had waited 16 years for. A lot had changed since then. The wall had come down. President after the president had come and gone. Some strangely popular sport named “soccer” came to the US…But I never really paid attention to the outside world. That’s what it was known as. Outside. Where the air was fresh and the sun was a warm yellowy gold. But my planet. I loved my own planet. My very own world with no evil…No Sith could ruin this sanctuary. I only became aware of these events when changing the cartridges that allowed myself to switch from one moment of happiness to the next, as the news flicked on. With the planet that surrounding my own changing every passing day, the fact that the next chapter of my beloved film saga was being released so many years later provided the evidence to prove the vast number of changes.

My studies intensified the few months and weeks that remained before the birth of “The Phantom Menace.” Then, two planetary rotations later I was ready to venture out onto the alien, igneous rock. The day came. I was dressed in my usual robes for such an occasion. A vintage and tattered robe which belonged to a master of my religion aeons ago. Well, that’s what the now crumpled packaging said anyway. I always kept one still in the actual packaging so I had two of every product. Preservation before pleasure. Although I always took a high level of pleasure from keeping a product in the packaging – eyes were made to look after all. I awoke. Ready to step forth onto the inferior planet. And did so. The warm summer day could be felt right at one’s very core due to the pure consistent radiance of the fiery mass in the sky. Outside. This was a different world. Alien creatures roamed the streets. Large open spaces of vibrant greens, browns and yellows were combined with mundane grey landscapes of thick smog and cramped towers. Very different to Courasant; any padawan could tell that.

Finally, arrival at the place where it all died. After moving through the cramped moving sectors I could see it as clear as day. My destination. Staring me right in the face, the bright lights pulled any passing person like insects towards it. I felt it. This place was strong in the force. Very strong. But after the running time of the film…several hours spent sat in my chair digesting what had happened, that strength I felt died a slow but pain assured death. The curtains rose inside the complex and I nearly cried like a youngling with anticipation. But, as the story unfolded. As the seconds turned to minutes. The minutes to hours, as every passing millisecond grew quicker and quicker, a feeling of pure rage overcame my entire body. I was paralysed with the fear of what I was watching unfold. I tried to remember my training. Remember my training.

Fear is a path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”

  A path that has already taken place due to ugly scenes being projected onto the screen and into my very soul. I just wanted to tear the fucking thing down so my eyes wouldn’t burn any longer from watching the painful item. But to do that I would get into serious trouble. And we mustn’t get into trouble, no we’re a good boy, aren’t we? I waited it out but given the next five minutes I was physically sick because of the episode and was having a fucking episode of my own. Fucking fuck sake. The urge to pull down the screen was valmorphanising inside me. What could I do? By staying in my chair, I’d continue to be tortured. But if I arose and performed an action that would go against my teachings then I would have to face the consequences of the Jedi High Council. I’d be expelled from the Jedi Order. I’d be cast aside. Thrown away. Left to rot like rubbish in a trash compactor. The screen. The projector screen. The dark side was strong with it. Sure of this, I was. I can feel it reaching out to me.

You want this, don’t you? The hate is swelling in you now. Take your Jedi weapon. Use it. I am unarmed. Strike me down with it. Give in to your anger. With each passing moment, you make yourself more my servant.”

Temptation. I reached for the very item the evil spoke of.

“Good. Use your aggressive feelings, boy. Let the hate flow through you.”

I felt the force flow through my now rising body. The eyes of every mere mortal citizen in the dark room were now transfixed on me. Transfixed as I ripped down the evil in the room. Power flowing through my muscles as I forced down the deathly images on the screen. I had done my duty. For liberty and justice. For freedom. For the Republic.

“Young fool. Only now, at the end, do you understand…If you will not be turned, you will be destroyed.”

16 years have passed since the last time I felt this alone. My sentence? Worse than expected. My way of life ruined. My most cherished love destroyed. My life. My expulsion from the order. Occurred it did.


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